I was really looking forward for the last call until...

'til she added me.

It's been awhile since that "fb issues" we've had. Sa dinami-dami ba naman ng fb accounts namin, halos lahat-lahat ng pinag-aawayan namin ay dahil at galing dun. Ang fb mismo. As in FACEBOOK.


I have known her other account for 6months. 6months that I have no access to it. And it's starting to annoy me that I'm NOT a 'friend' or any part of it. I started to think. and I hate how it confuses me. What is she holding back? What is she keeping from me?  What is really the problem?  Or was it about that 'trust' thingy again? Am I not that trusted? Or is it her pride? Is it me? Or is it her?

What am I to her exactly?




Earlier June this year, I cyber-stalked. Or hacked. Or borrowed -- yeah, borrowed an account just to get access, then checked her posts. I was stunned. She's saying things 'bout me (or anyone else who's just very likely me) How pathetic am I in that line.. Got myself struck in silence and teary-eyed. I have this feeling inside me.. racing. Maybe anger, disappointment, hopelessness.. maybe remorse. Even petrified. Yet...


..yet, i can't hate her. I wouldn't do that.
I can't. I JUST can't.



Now, I'm not sure what to feel. Happy? Contented? Should I be overwhelmed after all?
I can't even take a peek or view her profile. I don't know why. Maybe I'm scared.. scared on what I'd see.


I'm not sure what I feel.. or felt. All I know is I'm hurting.. 

I don't wanna ask too much. But if you don't like me, just say so. So I can distance myself before u forcefully forsake me. Ayt?!

I'M GIVING UP.

TWO INNOCENTS HAVING A CONVERSATION

G: "Yen, THANK YOU.. Ü madE my night.... x)


ng.fb q, kai pmpwala stress.. 'nya pg.open.. Hala!
kw juy una nkt.an naq sa h0me page.. Nyahaha. 'n dat made me ambot. Salamat.

Kung khbw ka sa ras0n, ai q kataw.e.. Hahaha! Thank u agen..

nyt.
[milagroDikokatug]"


(The day after..)

Me: "That was like three Thank You's. I'm overwhelmed."

G:
"shut up..
hahaha
ateyyy... ayg basaha ui..
waaaa"

Me: "hahaha.. mnah nuon."

G:
"xD ayawww daiiiii!!
laina...
btawww.. true 2 xa.. gkan 2 sa pnaka.ilawman sa akong kasing'2x.."

Me:
"Char..
Ayaaaaaawwww!! kai di gai q ka.get over. Haha "

G:
"hahaha.. hilumi ui.."

Me:
"Abot tangkugo aqng smile. =)) "

G:
"hahaha! diin gd ka anahhh.."

Me:
"gkan 2 sa pnaka.ilawman sa akong kasing'2x.. :)) "

G:
"nyahaha.. luoooodd...
ai knug balika"

Me:
"ai pgbuot..
kai gnhan raq."

G:
" ngasaba mn... kaw guddd..."

Finally!

How long has it been? a week? two weeks? It seems like forever since I had that giddy feeling of visiting my blog.

School has been a drag lately. Finals came, heartaches, things changed and all that shit. With all the disturbances, finally I am finished reading The Secrets of the Immortal Nicholas Flamel: The Alchemyst Book. It happened on a boring Sunday afternoon. I found myself being out of my uncertainties, and then I desperately find ways to escape my boredom. And there, I found the Book. Instead of reading the last page where I left off, I read again the very first page and read it all over. Merely finishing the book, questions came out from my mind. How can I buy the second edition of this book? Do I have to buy the second one? I'm at least reading the last part, but why am I feeling that this is just the beginning? Why am I this thrilled and desperate of having the second book? Really, I'm not kidding. When I bought this book, it was my extra money from my allowances and I really, as in really saved just to buy it. It was the verrrrryy first book I'd ever bought. And sem-break is approaching, where should I get all the money I need? I'm on the edge. Really, I don't know. Haha


Why am I INTO this?
It's a series with subtle mixture of mythology and folklore and history. Countless gods, heroes, monsters, spirits, and historical figures who brighten (and darken) the story keep the reader flip the pages with excited hands.

The bizarre world of The Secrets of the Immortal Nicholas Flamel is, as the name suggests, filled with secrets, mysteries, half-truths, and half-lies. The plot revolves around Nicholas Flamel, the celebrated Alchemyst; his wife Perenelle Delamere, the powerful Sorceress; the archvillain John Dee, alchemist, necromancer and magician; the twins of legend, Sophie and Josh Newman, the Silver and the Gold, one of whom will save the world, and the other fated to destroy it; and a number of Immortal humans, Elders, and other magical beings that have no right to exist outside daydreams and nightmares.

…

   I am legend.

   There was a time when I said that death has no claim over me, that illness could not touch me. That is no longer true. Now I know the date of my death, and that of my wide, too: and it is today.

   I was born in the Year of Our Lord 1330, more than six hundred and seventy years ago. I have had a good life, a long life, and I have been many things in my time: a physician and a cook, a bookseller and a soldier, a teacher of languages and chemistry, both an officer of the law and a thief.

  But before all these I was an alchemyst. I was the Alchemyst.

    

  I was acknowledged as the greatest Alchemyst of all, sought after the kings and princes, by emperors and even the Pope himself. I could turn ordinary metal into gold, I could change common stones into precious jewels. More than this: I discovered the secret of Life Eternal hidden deep in a book if ancient magic.

  Now my wife, Perenelle, has been kidnapped and the book stolen.

  Without the book, she and I will age. Within the full cycle of the moon, we will wither and die. And if we die, then the evil we had fought so long against will triumph. The Elder Race will reclaim this Earth again, and they will wipe humanity from the face of this planet.

  But I will not go down without a fight.
  

  For I am the immortal Nicholas Flamel.

—From the Day Booke of Nicholas Flamel, Alchemyst

   Writ this day, Thursday, 7th June

   in San Francisco, my adopted city